Forgiveness or Letting Go

At the end of November, I was drawn to look at the first three steps again. Today my new spiritual director, who is the interim priest at my church, suggested that I would be helped if I started attending Al-Anon meetings again. So tonight I have been looking through my 1994 copy of Courage to Change.

Here is a meditation from that book about forgiveness or letting go:

"The most loving form of detachment I have found has been forgiveness. Instead of thinking of it as an eraser to wipe another's slate clean or a gavel that I pound to pronounce someone 'not guilty,' I think of forgiveness as a pair of scissors. I use it to cut the strings of resentment that bind me to a problem or a past hurt. By releasing resentment, I set myself free.

"When I am consumed with negativity over another person's behavior, I have lost my focus. I needn't tolerate what I consider unacceptable, but wallowing in negativity will not alter the situation. If there is action to take, I am free to take it. Where I am powerless to change the situation, I will turn it over to my Higher Power. By truly letting go, I detach and forgive.

"When my thoughts are full of bitterness, fear, self-pity, and dreams of revenge, there is little room for love or for the quiet voice of guidance within me. I am willing to love myself enough to admit that resentments hold me back, and then I can let them go."

This so reminds me of Brother Lawrence, who talked about letting go like this:

--If I do something good, I thank God, and then I give it to God.

--If I do something wrong, I ask for forgiveness, and I give it to God.

I have needed all these reminders today. And I feel confirmed that Al-Anon is a place for me to be again. The first three steps are my prayer:

1. I admit I am powerless over persons, places, and things and that my life has become unmanageable.

2. I believe that a Power greater than myself can restore me to sanity.

3. I make the decision to turn my will and my life over to the care of God.