For A New Beginning

In out-of-the-way places of the heart,

          where your thoughts never think to wander,

          this beginning has been quietly forming,

                    waiting until you were ready to emerge.

For a long time it has watched your desire,

          feeling the emptiness growing inside you,

          noticing how you willed yourself on,

                    still unable to leave what you had outgrown.

It watched you play with the seduction of safety

          and the gray promises that sameness whispered,

          heard the waves of turmoil rise and relent,

                    wondered would you always live like this.

Then the delight, when your courage kindled,

          and out you stepped onto new ground,

          your eyes young again with energy and dream,

                    a path of plenitude opening before you.

Though your destination is not yet clear

          you can trust the promise of this opening;

          unfurl yourself into the grace of beginning

                    that is at one with your life’s desire.

Awaken your spirit to adventure;

          hold nothing back, learn to find ease in risk;

          soon you will be home in a new rhythm,

                    for your soul senses the world that awaits you.

~John O’Donohue, To Bless the Space Between Us

Begin!

O, Begin!

Fix some part of every day for private exercises. . . . 

Whether you like it or no, read and pray daily.

It is for your life; there is no other way:

else you will be trifler all your days. . . .

Do justice to your own soul;

give it time and means to grow.

Do not starve yourself any longer.

~John Wesley

Friday Five: Turn the Page!

3DogMom brings today's Friday Five to RevGalBlogPals:

Whether or not we make resolutions with the new year, we all transition to a new, physical calendar. In recent years my favorite wall calendar is called Pooped Puppies, a monthly collection of sleepy, or sleeping, pups that can’t help but evoke an “awwwww.” for many years my godmother gave me a flat, weekly desk calendar that featured National Geographic photos. One of the great things about calendars is that for each of us they fulfill the “form and function” requirement–a place to indulge an interest while serving a purpose.
 For today’s FF, tell us about five calendar themes that you like to see hanging on your walls or going with you to appointments, or that you WISH existed to adorn and accompany your life.



I have not been blogging much lately, but this Friday Five clicks with me because I love calendars and always write friends' birthdays on my new calendar on New Year's Day. I have done that since I was in college, which was more than four decades ago.

1. Kitchen calendar: I take time on my trips to look for calendars and tend to choose ones that are of nature, especially trees. This is the one that has everyone's birthday listed.


2. Birthday calendar: When I was younger, I had a book calendar that listed everybody's birthdays, but that was always mislaid. I just got a birthday calendar for the wall from Etsy.com. It also had pictures of trees, but are the creator's renditions. It may be a more permanent choice in the future, though the tradition of writing on the calendar on New Year's Day may be one I am not ready to surrender. I still need to record the birthdays on this one though.
 
3. Google calendar: This online calendar on both my iphone and ipad helps me to keep track of regular commitments, especially my RA medications--once weekly of Methotextrate pills and bi-weekly injections of Humira. The latter one can be confusing in the rush of life (holidays most recently).

4. Check-off calendar: For the new year, I resurrected a form I created about five years ago with weekly check-off squares for daily disciplines of meditation, piano practice, walking, etc. Some habits are in place, but not all of them. Physically marking off a box and seeing the monthly results on the bathroom wall will (hopefully) give me positive reinforcement to continue.

5. Mental calendar: This may not be as dependable as it has been in past years--remembering appointments, regular events. I've missed the last TWO Thursdays for posting prayers at RevGalBlogPals, and so I need to depend less on my brain's remembering and write more things down! My awareness of this not working as well as it used to makes me realize that I need to put more reminders somewhere.

The Growing Edge

For the New Year

Found on Pinterest.

Friday Five: Beginning Again

O begin!
 Fix some part of every day for private exercises.
Whether you like it or not, read and pray daily. 
It is for your life; there is no other way; 
else you will be a trifler all your days. . . . 
Do justice to your own soul; give it time and means to grow. 
Do not starve yourself any longer." 
~~John Wesley 

Rev. Pat Raube brings today's Friday Five for RevGalBlogPals:

The New Year has dawned! At this point, we are four days in. As for me and my house, there is a concerted effort afoot to keep a record of everything I eat, as well as the seasonal re-commitment to morning prayer. At the same time, I'm trying to cultivate a more self-accepting stance, an attitude of gentleness and forgiveness with myself when I don't keep those promises. Herewith, a Friday Five all about Resolutions and Absolutions.

Resolutions, which are really re-commitments:

1. Start by sharing your success stories with us: In the past, what resolution has been your most successful? What change have you made that has been the most beneficial, to your mood, health, finances, or other way of being in the world?


Probably the major changer was the commitment to pray "Bless _____________, change me" when I was irritated or bothered by someone else. Getting into the habit of praying or merely saying that eventually brought forth peace within me and changes that I could perceive much later. It sounds inconsequential, but it is a powerful practice that I am committing to begin again.


In the past year, with my shoulder surgery performed exactly one year ago today, physical therapy, water aerobics and the re-commitment to Weight Watchers brought forth better health and well-being for me. And I am beginning anew after my indulgent holidays.

2. What is one thing you hope to do differently this year with regard to health, either physical or spiritual? If you are satisfied with your current status in both areas, perhaps you would be willing to share something you've already done (or regularly do) to care for yourself.


I want to start walking a set route more routinely/regularly. Our current cold spell in south TX makes it a good time to begin, because it is not as hot and humid like it normally is.  I want to return to water aerobics classes at the YWCA, which fell by the wayside with the holidays and colder weather. I am considering going back to Tai Chi again, as new classes start next week.

3. What is one thing you hope your family (of origin, of choice, however you define your primary place of mutual emotional sustenance) will do differently this year? A new tradition for birthdays? More vacation time? Game night? Feel free to really dream about ways to deepen your connections with those you love.

Learn to play Mexican Train dominoes-- I bought the game for my family to play over the short time the kids were here, but we never got around to it. Chuck and I cannot figure out how to play, so the plan is to invite friends (who originally told me about the addictive quality of the game) over for dinner and have them teach us how to play. Perhaps that will be a regular activity in the future, who knows?

4. What is one thing you hope your community of faith will consider doing differently this year? New music? Different approaches to preaching? Rearranging the furniture? If you are in a position to try to introduce change, share some of your enthusiasm and/ or anxiety with us!

With our new priest, there will be change--no one is sure what. He has a lot of enthusiasm with his youth (around 40), outgoing personality, and this being the first time he is the "main" guy.  
For myself, I am pondering what is the future of a church library. Ours was repainted--off white--last year. The walls are still bare, so what is to be done? It is almost like a blank canvas. Having the new year arrive is helpful to begin again with the library!

Absolutions:

5. In what area would you most like to learn to be gentle with yourself? For what would you most like to forgive yourself? Share your ideas and strategies for extending yourself the kind of grace we know we are assured of. 

This is connected with #1. I need to let go of guilt I automatically take up when things go badly, which is an illogical action. A friend told me a good story connected with that today:

A few days ago she noticed all the fallen, brown leaves (in south TX, leaves fall in January!)  on her lawn and thought she should rake them up, but she didn't. Then she observed herself automatically telling herself she was "bad" for not doing that, which spiraled down into condemning herself for putting off the leaf raking and other things ALL the time, and so what a "bad" person she is. She was able to step back and realize that all her energy was caught up in the self-condemnation instead of anything productive. She realized that there is nothing good or bad about the leaf accumulation, which is more about detachment. She said every time she observes a leaf, just lying in the house or anywhere else, she notices it without jumping into personal judgments. It is a practice in detaching.

My friend's story gives me an image of how I react to things in my life and how I would like to stop doing that. Remembering how she is trying to live is a lesson for me in the new year.

O begin again!

Forgotten War: 1950-1953

I had not realized that the Korean War was called "The Forgotten War" until I saw the Rose Bowl Parade this morning. I was struck by the float sponsored by the Defense Department to commemorate the Korean War ending 60 years ago.

Go here for more pictures and the story about this being built.

I pay attention to info about the Korean War, because my father served there in the First Marine Division until he was wounded. He refused to be carried off until his men were safe. That is why he was awarded the Silver Star and the Purple Heart medals.

Due to his convalescence, he was at the Bremerton Navy Base when I was born in 1950.

He never talked about combat. Perhaps that is why he refused to have any fire arms in our home. I respect him for his service and for that action. He died ten years ago at the age of 79.

Happy New Year!

As this year draws to its end,
We give thanks for the gifts it brought
And how they became inlaid within
Where neither time nor tide can touch them.

The days when the veil lifted
And the soul could see delight;
When a quiver caressed the heart
In the sheer exuberance of being here.

Surprise that came awake
In forgotten corners of old fields
Where expectation seemed to have quenched.

The slow, brooding times
When all was awkward
And the wave in the mind
Pierced every sore with salt.

The darkened days that stopped
The confidence of the dawn.

Days when beloved faces shone brighter
With light from beyond themselves;
And from the granite of some secret sorrow
A stream of buried tears loosened.

We bless this year for all we learned,
For all we loved and lost
And for the quiet way it brought us
Nearer to our invisible destination.

John O'Donohue. To Bless the Space Between Us: A Book of Blessings. NY: Doubleday, 2008. 159-160.

Questions for 2012

Today being the last day of 2012, it is a time to look back upon the year and consider what I learned from its events. I liked the questions asked by Elizabeth O'Connor as quoted on Inward/Outward that are below. I numbered the questions in the arrangement that pleased me. You may want to choose one or two to ponder.

1. What took place in your home relations? Your work relations? Your church relations? What events in the larger community of city, country and world most captured your attention?

2. Who were the significant people in your life? What books and art instructed your mind and heart?

3. Did you create anything this year? Did you make any new discoveries about yourself? How were you gift last year to a person, a community or an institution?

 

4. What was your greatest joy in this year gone? What was your greatest sorrow? What caused you the most disappointment? What caused you the most sadness?

5. In what areas of your life did you grow? Were these areas related to your joy or your pain?

What are your regrets? How would you do things differently, if you could live the year again? What did you learn?

6. Did you have a recurring dream? What theme or themes ran through your year?

7. Did you grow in your capacity to be a person in community--to bear your own burdens, to let others bear theirs? Did you have sufficient time apart with yourself?

8. Did you root your life more firmly in Scripture? Did you grow in your understanding of yourself? What was your most important insight? Did God seem near or far off?

9. How do you want to create the new year? What kind of commitment do you want to make to yourself? Your community? To the oppressed people of the world? How do the questions about commitment make you feel? Angry? Challenged? Hopeful?

10. Who are the people with whom you would like to deepen your relationships in the year to come? Do you have relationships that need to be healed? What can you do to heal your own heart? What can others do to assist in your healing?

11. Is there a special piece of inward work that you would like to accomplish? Is there a special outward work? 

12. What are the goals that seem important to you? What are your hopes? What are your fears? What are the immediate first steps that you can take toward the goals that seem important to you?

From Inward/Outward. Subscribe here.

For the New Year!

My blogging friend Ellie posted this on Facebook from Suzy's Daily Quotes, and I think it's a good idea. In fact, I wish I could do this for 2012 on New Year's Eve this year.

Start on January 1st with an empty jar. Throughout the year write the good things that happened to you on little pieces of paper. On December 31st, open the jar and read all the amazing things that happened to you that year.~pinterest

Happy New Year!

Friday Five: Last Year and Next Year

Sally brings today's Friday Five for RevGalBlogPals:

A simple Friday Five for a busy part of the year; indulge me by sharing two fives:
As you look back over 2011 share 5 blessings, they can be as grand or as simple as you like,if you year has been like mine they are probably a mixture!

<--2011 Blessings (without counting family):
Three fabulous trips:
1. Spain with my youngest daughter MJ

2. U.S. National Parks on road trip with husband CB

3. Russia with friends in the Methodist Russian Initiative

4. Finally, the diagnosis of rheumatoid arthritis, with eventual relief of symptoms through the combination of methotextrate and Humira.

5. Reconnection with two seemingly "lost" people: my cousin Karen through cards and letters and former blogging friend Christina through the online game Words With Friends.

-->Looking to 2012:
1. More frequent visits to Austin to be with our granddaughter Avery, as she grows in both movement and learning. (She is walking a lot now.) Plus, see her parents there!

2. Visits to Houston to see son BJ.

3. I also hope to make visits to WA to see AE and KA plus to Calgary to see my elderly cousin Margaret.

4. Finally commit to and accomplish cleaning out excess in my house, which is too overwhelming to list. I hope to consistently work at this, and not start and stop--as I tend to do.

5. Spend one morning every other week at the church library, cleaning and organizing it.

Words for 2011

To see the word cloud enlarged either click on the image or click here

Thanks to Abbey of the Arts for requesting and compiling words of intention for 2011.

New Year's Word/Resolution

I keep thinking about something a friend told me about New Year's Resolutions--that not many are kept and so she was trying this year to have a WORD and remember it all year. Hers was "NOW."

I like that idea. It reminds me of how people would trek to the desert in the 3rd-5th centuries and ask the Dessert Ammas and Abbas "for a word." This was a word to help them on their spiritual journey, a word to ponder and wrestle with.

I have not chosen a word yet. I was bothered by the phrase "daily diligence," which I saw at Tim's blog yesterday. Does that mean I'm supposed to choose that??

I have not made any resolutions either, except for returning to Weight Watchers yesterday.

Maybe something will arise while I am at Lebh Shomea next week. I am leaving CB and MJ here while I go there on Friday for six days.

Year of the Rabbit

Chinese New Year
2011 - The year of the rabbit

THE RABBIT
2011, 1999, 1987, 1975, 1963, 1951

The rabbit’s association with the moon in Chinese mythology has created a sign that is partial to beauty. They are sensitive creatures who place great importance on peace and tranquillity. The rabbit is also the sign that indicates longevity and fortune. They are quietly determined, talented and wildly ambitious. Rabbits are very tactful and can negotiate contracts with alarming clarity. They are pleasant people, kind and considerate to the sensitivities of others, Rabbits know how to take things in their stride without getting overly stressed out. They are well liked for their cool demeanour. And yet, when the going gets tough, the rabbit will make a hasty exit, passing the buck to others. Rabbits are also hypersensitive and overly sentimental. They tend to get moody and have a quiet cunningness under their pleasant veneer. Rabbits may think they are being cautious but in reality, they like to complicate matters, often indulging in the worst case scenario.

The Chinese zodiac signs are determined by the lunar year in which you were born. The Chinese believe the animal ruling one's birth year has a profound influence on personality, and destiny.
The saying is: "This animal hides in your heart."

Years Corresponding to Chinese Zodiac Signs:

Rat	1900	1912	1924	1936	1948	1960	1972	1984	1996	2008	2020
Ox	1901	1913	1925	1937	1949	1961	1973	1985	1997	2009	2021
Tiger	1902	1914	1926	1938	1950	1962	1974	1986	1998	2010	2022
Rabbit	1903	1915	1927	1939	1951	1963	1975	1987	1999	2011	2023
Dragon	1904	1916	1928	1940	1952	1964	1976	1988	2000	2012	2024
Snake	1905	1917	1929	1941	1953	1965	1977	1989	2001	2013	2025
Horse	1906	1918	1930	1942	1954	1966	1978	1990	2002	2014	2026
Sheep	1907	1919	1931	1943	1955	1967	1979	1991	2003	2015	2027
Monkey	1908	1920	1932	1944	1956	1968	1980	1992	2004	2016	2028
Rooster	1909	1921	1933	1945	1957	1969	1981	1993	2005	2017	2029
Dog	1910	1922	1934	1946	1958	1970	1982	1994	2006	2018	2030
Boar	1911	1923	1935	1947	1959	1971	1983	1995	2007	2019	2031

Info found here.

Happy New Year!

Friday Five: Going Forward & Looking Back

"Looking Forward, Looking Back"
Quilt made by Helen Godden

Singing Owl brings today's Friday Five for RevGalBlogPals:
I'm not a big fan of New Year's resolutions, but it does seem a good time for some reflection and planning. For the last few days I keep thinking of Psalm 90:12 So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom. Among other things, that seems to say that reflection is in order if we want to learn and grow.

For some of us, this has been an incredibly difficult year; for others it has been a year of many joys. For all of us, there have been challenges and questions and there have been blessings and--maybe even an answer or two! As we say our goodbyes to 2010 and look towards 2011, share with us five blessings from 2010 along with five hopes or dreams for 2011.

2010:
1. The blessing of our first grandchild--sweet Avery, daughter of oldest son DC and wife AA.

2. My Christmas tree present from all my children to replace the empty space in our backyard. This past summer we had to chop down a rotten ash tree.

Brothers DC and BJ
who picked out and planted the live oak tree.
Dec. 26, 2010

3. Lots of wonderful trips with friends and husband CB in this past year.

4. Having two different occasions with all my children--the surprise at my 60th birthday celebration when AE and KA came from Seattle to Austin, and this Christmas with everyone here. I am certainly blessed to have so many children (and a grandchild) when I have few relatives left in this world. (I'm also glad that CB and I are 60 years old!)

5. The blessing of meditation/contemplative prayer nurtures and sustains me.

2011:
1. Going to visit MJ in Spain. She will be an exchange student in Granada for this spring semester.

2. An immediate hope is to stay one week at Lebh Shomea, House of Prayer in Sarita, TX in January. I have not been there for about two years and really want to be in the quiet.

3. Clean out and de-clutter. I made some starts in 2010 by donating clothes and books; I even sold about 25 books on Amazon.com!

4. Renew my pledge to healthier eating with the help of Weight Watchers, the local Farmers Market, and knowledge of Fair Trade practices.

5. More visits with my children and especially watching granddaughter Avery grow.

2011 calendars

I love wall-hanging calendars. I usually have three--in the kitchen, in the laundry room, and in my office. In past years I usually got calendars with pictures of trees. This year I have Asian and Inuit art calendars, plus a Book Lovers one.

When I was in junior high school in Japan, I started writing friends' birthdays on the appropriate calendar boxes on New Year's Day. That tradition continued until a few years ago when I started writing the names on their corresponding spots a few days earlier--at the end of the previous year.

I spent 1+ hours doing this tonight, while CB was at choir practice and MJ was out to dinner with a friend. I really enjoyed doing this, loving each person as I wrote his/her name down. It was fun to write "Avery is 1!" on Nov. 22, 2011. (I only specify ages for my children and grandchild.)

Now that Facebook announces friends' birthdays, this hand-dating is not so necessary, but I like to do it. Besides, not all my friends are on FB.

I know I have forgotten some blogging friends' birthdays, because the only one I wrote on calendars tonight was "Catherine W." who intermittently blogs at Come to the Table. Email me if you want to remind me of your birthday, and I will be delighted to write your name on my calendar.

Words for the Year

Christine at Abbey of the Arts asked readers to contribute words of their intentions for the New Year. I wanted this to be bigger, but it's not. Click here or on the above image for a larger view.

And I am grateful to Mary Beth in directing me to find this at Abbey of the Arts.

What word would you choose for 2010? I'm in between "listen" and "mindfulness."