Swami Abhishiktananda

Abhishiktananda
(Fr. Henri Le Saux)
1910-1973

Henri Le Saux grew up in Brittany, France and excelled in his studies, which continued after he joined the Benedictine Abbey of Saint Anne of Kergonan when he was 19 years old. He felt particularly drawn to the Greek Fathers, especially Gregory Nazianzen’s Hymn to God Beyond All Names:

You who are beyond all, what other name befits you?

No words suffice to hymn you. Alone you are ineffable.

Of all beings you are the End, you are One, you are all, you are none.

Yet not one thing, nor all things. . . . You alone are the Unnameable.

Such Emptiness was a prelude to his call to India, which became an obsession around 1934, when he was only 24 years old, before his ordination. It took 14 more years of persistent asking, writing, and waiting before Henri was sent to India (in 1948), which he never left. He traveled in India and struggled with his Christian faith and the mystical experience of advaita (non-duality).

"He remained a priest, and he remained a Benedictine monk but he was a long way from the average expectations of a Catholic priest. He was beyond all structures, yet he remained a disciple of Jesus. As far as the church is concerned, he never left it but he did become distanced from it. He came to see more and more clearly the false duality of the church, for instance, in regarding people as active or contemplative. In the end even the Mass became unimportant: he could celebrate or not. Everything was divine, so it didn't really matter. But when he did say Mass, it was a momentous occasion, for he was at the level of knowing beyond any words." (38)

De Boulay, Shirley. Swami Abhishiktananda: Essential Writings. Maryknoll, NY: Orbis Books, 2007.

The other night when I could not sleep, I found an old used copy of Abhishiktananda's book "Saccidananda: A Christian Approach to Advaitic Experience." I am currently reading it again (for the "first" time) and then re-discovered Shirley Du Boulay's book on my shelves, too. So I am newly intrigued by this amazing mystic who experienced Christ from the depth of Hindu spirituality.

Google ABHISHIKTANANDA to find out more about him. A good resource is here, with a collection of articles by him here.

And what prompted me to start writing about him was this quote that I boldly highlighted in Du Boulay's book:

"Only to the extent that you are not attached to any thought, to any point of view, to anything at all, that you do not desire or fear anything, that you do not feel delight or sorrow in anything--only so can the void be created in your intellect. If I am worried about what will happen tomorrow, about what I will have to decide tomorrow, I will not be able to reach this void. I must have absolute faith in this mystery of the beyond into which I throw myself. Whether I call it Christ, Shiva, Parama-atman does not matter. Total acceptance that someone is there to receive me, to take complete charge of me, or rather that in the end I will find myself set free from all my present limitations."
~~July 27, 1955, Diary

De Boulay, Shirley. Swami Abhishiktananda: Essential Writings. Maryknoll, NY: Orbis Books, 2007.

That's detachment.

"My Stroke of Insight" book

Due to the TED Talks video of Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor, I had to read Taylor's book My Stroke of Insight: A Brain Scientist's Personal Journey. You may recall that I wrote about her video here.

At the same time of reading Taylor's book, I've also been Eckhart Tolle's A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose (Oprah's Book Club, Selection 61) , so that together these books brought great insight into the Presence of God always with us.

I am amazed at the intelligence and determination of Taylor in recovering from the stroke she suffered at the age of 37. You can see all that if you watch the 18 minute video of her TED talk.

Since she was (and is) a neuroanatomist, she had great knowledge and confidence in her brain as she suffered the stroke. In fact, she remembers telling herself when she realized what was happening: "Yep, I'm having a stroke. . .but I'm a very busy woman! All right, since I can't stop this stroke from happening, then, okay, I'll do this for a week! I'll learn what I need to know about how my brain creates my perception of reality and then I'll meet my schedule, next week. Now, what am I doing? Getting help. I must stay focused and get help." And she pleaded with herself: "Remember, please remember everything you are experiencing! Let this be my stroke of insight into the disintegration of my own cognitive mind." (46)

She prepares the reader for what happened by spending two beginning chapters describing in simple terms how the brain works. (I needed that info!) The she describes the stroke as she remembers and how her recovery went, which lasted more than eight years.

Taylor lost all her understanding of language and her ability to speak; she lost awareness of where her body started and ended; she lost much movement. She gained an awareness of her unity with ALL and even wondered at one point how she'd ever fit back into her little body. She became aware of her own composition of cells, as well as seeing the cellular makeup of her surroundings.

As the bleeding in the left side of her brain progressed, she suddenly noticed SILENCE. The chatter of thinking had stopped. Taylor believes that was because the left side of her brain was losing its various functions, so she relied on the right side, which was perceiving the bigger picture of Unity with ALL. She writes:

"In place of that constant chatter that had attached me to the details of my life, I felt enfolded by a blanket of tranquil euphoria. . . As the language centers in my left hemisphere grew increasingly silent and I became detached from the memories of my life, I was comforted by an expanding sense of grace. In this void of higher cognition and details pertaining to my normal life, my consciousness soared into an all knowingness, a 'being at one' with the universe, if you will." (41)

In the hospital, she could not understand what anyone said to her. She said she could sense whether someone brought positive and loving energy towards her or negative attitudes. The people who came close to her and talked softly and lovingly brought her to pay attention, which was a great effort. However, those people who were abrupt, hurried and talked loudly (to MAKE her understand!) caused her to retreat into herself to the "la-la-land" where she felt tranquility.

This makes me think of the energy that emanates from each of us and how our thoughts and/or prayers affect others. This goes along with the quote I have at the top of my blog by Quaker Harold Loukes: "An act of love that fails is just as much a part of the divine life as an act of love that succeeds, for love is measured by its own fullness, not by its reception." That gives me such hope for change in the world--by our hopes, prayers, and love.

In her recovery, Taylor became aware of how the cells in her body reacted to strong feelings and the ingestions of such foods that contained caffeine and sugar. She made choices to avoid agitation of the cells in her boy by refraining from caffeine and sugar (which I should do) and choosing to respond differently to situations so that anger or fear would not immediately appear unless needed. She wrote:

"When I become conscious of what cognitive loops my brain is running, I then focus on how these loops feel physiologically inside my body. Do I feel alert? Are my eyes dilated? Is my breath deep or shallow? Do I feel tightness in my chest? Do I feel lightness in my head? Is my stomach upset/ Do I feel antsy or anxious? Are my legs jiggling? Neuronal loops (circuits) of fear, anxiety or anger, can be triggered by all sorts of different stimulation. But once triggered, these different emotions produce a predictable physiological response that you can train yourself to consciously observe." (151)

Being aware of the present moment is a spiritual practice in all religions or spiritualities. This is what she's emphasizing. Taylor felt enlightenment or egolessness due to the effects of her stroke. Suddenly she didn't have all those chattering thoughts, which we try to rid ourselves of through meditation, contemplation, centering prayer and other disciplines.

Her experiences made me feel that a scientist observed the spiritual reality I believe in. Each of us has the ability to perceive our unity and connection. We need to pay attention!

"Step one to experiencing inner peace is the willingness to be present in the right here, right now." (159)

"Your stuff is your stuff, and my stuff is my stuff. Feeling deep inner peace and sharing kindness is always a choice for either of us. Forgiving others and forgiving myself is always a choice. Seeing this moment as a perfect moment is always a choice." (148)

Book: "Mystical Hope"

I am re-reading an excellent book by Cynthia Bourgeault, Episcopal priest, author and retreat leader, which is entitled Mystical Hope: Trusting in the Mercy of God. The second chapter can pretty much be summed up by the quote I posted yesterday on Happiness.

Bourgeault defines "mystical hope" as:

1. Mystical hope is not tied to a good outcome, to the future. It lives a life of its own, seemingly without reference to external circumstances and conditions.

2. It has something to do with presence--not a future good outcome, but the immediate experience of being me, held in communion, by something intimately at hand.

3. It bears fruit within us at the psychological level in the sensations of strength, joy, and satisfaction: an "unbearable lightness of being." But mysteriously, rather than deriving these gifts from outward expectations being met, it seems to produce them from within. (9-10)

My detachment post fits that description, especially of #3. As C. S. Lewis wrote, such experiences are being "surprised by joy." I have come to realize that detachment is much more than merely letting go--it seems to be a filling of God's peace, love, and/or hope.

But this book goes on much farther to describe God's mercy as all-encompassing in what is "like a 'luminous web' intended to connect and interweave everything, in which all the knot ends of reality come together in a huge tapestry of divine love." (32)

"So when we think of mercy, we should be thinking first and foremost of a bond, an infallible link of love that holds the created and uncreated realms together. The mercy of God does not come and go, granted to some and refused to others. Why? Because it is unconditional--always there, underlying everything. It is literally the force that holds everything in existence, the gravitational field in which we live and move and have our being. Just like that little fish swimming desperately in search of water, we, too--in the words of Psalm 103--'swim in mercy as in an endless sea.' Mercy is God's innermost being turned outward to sustain the visible and created world in unbreakable love." (25)

The author goes on to cite Jacob Boehme, who "saw mercy as 'the holy element': the root enerby out of which all else in the visible universe is made. The Mercy is 'holy substantiality'--the innermost essence of being itself. It is that 'river of God,' running like the sap through the tree of live." (30)

Oh, to know all this--to realize this is what the mystics of all religions have been trying to tell us.
Just as Thomas Keating, proponent of Centering Prayer, says:

"The notion that God is absent is the fundamental illusion of the human condition." (41)

Little Ego

Yesterday my friend JS talked about her little ego taking over. . . I hadn't heard the false self or shadow called that before, and then today I get Eknath Easwaran's reading, and he mentions just that! Everything that attracts me these days is about detachment, which is acceptance, the present moment--looking to God and not ME!

God expects but one thing of you, and that is that you should come out of yourself insofar as you are a created being and let God be God in you.
– Meister Eckhart

In those moments when we forget ourselves – not thinking, “Am I happy?” but completely oblivious to our little ego – we spend a brief but beautiful holiday in heaven. The joy we experience in these moments of self-forgetting is our true nature, our native state. To regain it, we have simply to empty ourselves of what hides this joy: that is, to stop dwelling on ourselves. To the extent that we are not full of ourselves, God can fill us. “If you go out of yourself,” says Johannes Tauler, “without doubt he shall go in, and there will be much or little of his entering in according to how much or little you go out.”

~~Eknath Easwaran

The Thought for the Day is today's entry from Eknath Easwaran's Words to Live By. (Copyright 1999 and 2005 by The Blue Mountain Center of Meditation.)

Select the Thought for the Day for any day of the year.

Nonattachment

The Desert Mothers and Fathers called the quality of paying attention in the moment "nonattachment." Their thoughts go quite well with the my post on "Detachment."

When Abba Macarius was in Egypt, he found a man with a mule stealing his belongings. Then, as though he were a stranger, he helped the robber to load the animal, and peacefully sent him off, saying: "We have brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything with us. The Lord has given, and as he has wished, so it has happened. Blessed be the Lord in all things."

Let go and realize everything is from God and is not mine.

From Listen to the Desert: Secrets of Spiritual Maturity from the Desert Fathers and Mothers by Gregory Mayers:

"Nonattachment is the attitude that comes from the acceptance of the fact that everything about my life and in my life comes and goes in its own time regardless of my preferences or aversions." (35)

"Trying to keep relationships, pleasant experiences, a sense of security, youth, or anything else from their natural rhythms is both disruptive and detrimental to ourselves and to others. Anything that we hold onto will throw us off balance and eventually kill us if we persist in possessing it." (35)

"Nonattachment is far more subtle and profound than a refined disdain for or emotional indifference to events and people. It doesn't mean that we change our likes into dislikes and our dislikes into likes. It doesn't even have anything to do with wanting and not wanting. It has everything to do with 'I' want and 'I' don't want. It is letting go of the 'I' in the wanting and not wanting. In the words of Saint Thomas More, it means not taking seriously 'this bothersome thing I call myself.' (35-36)

"'This bothersome thing I call myself' finds protection behind three basic emotions: fear, shame, and anger." (37)

"The source of our fear, shame, and anger is an insecurity about ourselves. When we see through and let go of fear, shame, and anger, what we enter then is not tranquility, but our insecurity, letting go of the way we think we should be. This is nonattachment--letting go of the self, the self shrunk to the size of our most painful emotions." (38)

"Attention leads to a searing and uncommon honesty about ourselves. We will not allow ourselves to be fooled. We no longer play the mind games that hid our true, real, or authentic identity. " (40)

"The 'purpose' of contemplation is to lose our self: 'He who saves his life loses it, while he who loses his life for my sake discovers who he really is.'" (41) --see Matthew 16:25--

The lifestyle of prayer and commitment to sitting in silence are necessary for this growth. I need this training to look at God and not myself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Gartenfische has written beautifully about this here.

Detachment

I remember first hearing about “detachment” when I attended Al-Anon meetings in the 1990’s. At that time a friend gave me a meditation book for all the days of a year entitled Courage to Change. Looking at it tonight, I see that there are 14 days devoted to the subject of “detachment.” I went looking for the story I remember well of a woman displaying detachment by leaving her drunken spouse passed out on the floor and covering him with a blanket, which always puzzled me. That’s day’s reminder says:

"With my Higher Power’s help, I will keep a loving blanket of detachment with me. I will cover my loved ones with it, whether or not they struggle with a disease, keeping in mind that when I am dealing with other human beings, I am dealing with children of God." (22)

I never realized until today that that reminder describes the detachment I felt on Sunday. Meeting with my spiritual director today helped me to see that God gifted me with peace, which I now recognize as detachment, after a mini-crisis at home before church.

My husband did something that irritated me so much that I slammed the door when I went to get the morning paper! (I’m very good at passive aggression.) What usually would send me into anger and tears brought me to prayer instead. By the time I was in the church service, I found that I was praying for our hearts to be opened to each other and to God. When we kneeled side-by-side to receive the Eucharist, I found myself offering us to the Holy One. All morning I was bathed in God’s peace, with no resentment, my usual reaction, felt at all.

I was not intentionally asking for detachment or for forgiveness; I found myself giving myself to the Lord—and then offering us both. This did not feel like my will, but an expansion of Love opening up. The gift was revealed more fully today when I talked with Ani, my spiritual director. Until now, I never realized that detachment was so loving.

And this gift is pretty well described in Courage to Change:

"The most loving form of detachment I have found has been forgiveness. Instead of thinking of it as an eraser to wipe another’s slate clean or a gavel that I pound to pronounce someone ‘not guilty,’ I think of forgiveness as a scissors. I use it to cut the strings of resentment that bind me to a problem or a past hurt.

"When I am consumed with negativity over another person’s behavior, I have lost my focus. I needn’t tolerate what I consider unacceptable, but wallowing in negativity will not alter the situation. If there is action to take, I am free to take it. Where I am powerless to change the situation, I will turn it over to my Higher Power. By truly letting go, I detach and forgive.

"When my thoughts are full of bitterness, fear, self-pity, and dreams of revenge, there is little room for love or for the quiet voice of guidance within me. I am willing to love myself enough to admit that resentments hold me back, and then I can let them go." (289)

All the years of letting go and praying Bless ______, change me must have opened the way for God to bring me to this place of Love. Not me, but YOU. Thank you.

Such Hope and Love! It reminds me of my long-ago therapist telling me, "Trust the process." Trust the Lord. Trust Love.