Ash Wednesday

"We are not converted only once in our lives but many times,
and this endless series of large and small conversions,
inner revolutions, leads to our transformation in Christ."
~~Thomas Merton

One of the Lenten readers I am traveling with this Lent is by Emilie Griffin: Small Surrenders: A Lenten Journey. I have always liked her writing ever since I read Clinging: The Experience of Prayer, where she wrote that she noticed she was reading more about prayer than actually praying--that's a (sometimes) description of me, too.

Griffin writes:
"We are converted not only once in our lives but many times. And the conversion is little by little. Sometimes it is as imperceptible as grass growing. But Lent gives us a time to move the process along. Intentionally. By small surrenders." (6)

"Lent is our chance for a fresh start, a new page. We consciously let down our defenses against the grace of God. We admit to ourselves our need for improvement. We notice how hopeless we are. We tell God we're doing out best but we wish we could do better. We put ourselves in God's hands." (4)

I am facing this Lent with more intentionality, partly because Ash Wednesday is the anniversary of my father's death (in 2002). This is a symbol for me of the healing of my relationship and memories with him, which has been progressing in the past eight years. The death of a friend's father last week at the age of 97 brought this realization (of an inner revolution) forth, which I am marking with love today with the ashes.