Self-Discipline

Since I have always been someone who procrastinates, I think that I am a 9 on the Enneagram. With outside deadlines, I always get things done. (However, without them, I'm not so "efficient.") Even in graduate school in the past decade, I could write A papers a few days beforehand. It's a bad way to be, because I don't work to my full potential.

I recently rediscovered this book in my book-laden home: Making a Change for Good: A Guide to Compassionate Self-Discipline by Cheri Huber, who is a Zen teacher and author.
As a sidelight, I thought it was printed in the Papyrus font, which evidently is being used in all sorts of ways, according to my daughter in Seattle. This same daughter informed me that this book does not have the papyrus font; but now I don't know what type of font it is. Obviously, I am confused about the papyrus font, too.

I have a poor attitude about "self-discipline," because I broadly say, "I don't have any." Rationally, I realize I have to have some to survive, but I judge myself as inadequate in finishing some things, like my papers for graduate school, cleaning out years of junk in closets, dieting, etc., etc. So I am now working on a new attitude, which corresponds to my crossroads logo. This book is helping me, especially because it has a 30 day guided "retreat" with journaling at the back of the book.

I need to remember:

"Nothing in life is a matter of 'fault'; no amount of self-discipline will ever give anyone control over life (control is an illusion); happiness does not depend on circumstances; and life is always exactly as it is!" (2)

"...compassionate self-discipline is nothing other than being present rather than engaged in distracted, unfocused, addictive behaviors based in an I-need-to-fix-myself mentality." (4)

"WE DON'T LACK SELF-DISCIPLINE, WE LACK PRESENCE." (4)

The author's advice is to meditate, which goes along with my Lenten practice of sitting with God each day.