I feel like my mother was a remarkable woman; she was talented in many ways and very loving, especially to me, her only child. We were good friends all my life, which is why I still miss her today on this American holiday of Mother's Day, even though she died 22 years ago.
As I ponder this, I realize that I never wondered that she might have missed her mother, too. Until I had children of my own, I never thought too much of my mother having emotions other than the irritation she sometimes exhibited towards my father and/or me, otherwise she was pleasant.
I suppose it is difficult to empathize with someone else's feelings unless one has experienced it in a similar capacity. She must have missed her family during all the years we moved around with my dad in the Marine Corps, but never shared anything with me. (I was self-centered and only thought of how moves were difficult for
me!) When her parents died, she did not express her loneliness or regret at all. I was an adolescent at those time and would have been old enough to understand some of that--or so I think now.
I wish she had shared some of those feelings with me, but she was of the generation that did not complain. In fact, that is how she brought me up: "Don't bother people with your problems." It has taken me years to realize that expressing sad memories and/or emotions is not "complaining," which I am still learning how to do.
As people are expressing on FB and elsewhere, each female is the result of her mother and her children (if she has any). I am fortunate to have my four children, two with loving spouses, who are continuing to grow me into the person I am, as are my two granddaughters. I will always be thankful for the mother I had.
Happy Mother's Day to all: I hope you are able to treasure memories of your mother today.
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